First the answer to yesterday's vegetable question. According to the plant stake, that is the flower of the "Delicato Squash".
Monday, Monday, can't trust that day. Had a rough Sunday - dealing with a family crisis while several states away is difficult. I'm not known for my patience and having to just sit by the phone waiting for news about a loved one is hard.
Today, I feel like this Maxine. Sure do like her. I remember when they were part of the Hallmark Shoebox (?) line, and she was called Aunt Crabby. Or maybe I am confusing things in my old age.
I feel like I at a crossroad in my life and I'm not sure which road to take. I've always been astonished at how little decisions can have such big impacts down the road. Being a close cousin of that rat-bastoid Murphy (screw him and his little law too), in my case the repercussions are usually (1) life changing in ways I had not anticipated and (2) not usually the road that hindsight would have had me take. That's just the little decisions. I'm looking at making huge decisions involving selling the little cabin by the creek, moving out of state, trying to figure out where out of state, huge decisions, and I'm feeling like I am frozen in my tracks. I'm sure that if I were to look in the mirror, I would have that "deer in the headlights" look on my face.
Time is flying. Almost the middle of August already and kids across the country are getting ready for school to start (and in many places it already has). Summer is winding down and fall will be with us before ya know it. Time to be getting settled in for a long winter - not a time to be pulling up stakes and moving - summer is slipping away and soon the rains will be here.
An acquaintance channeled this for me, using my date of birth several days ago. I was amazed at how close it rang true and have been trying to keep these words of wisdom in my head, trying to chase away those worrisome thoughts.
okay, October 15
lots of worrying about stuff that never happens/listen listen to the stream of wisdom that comes through for you/don't money panic you have it/boy scout be prepared!/don't listen to fortune tellers gamblers frivolous associates drinking /work is the answer when you get confused/stab in the back? Ignore it and stay away/go for the quiet time all alone to recharge and protect your self /religious leaning for you and ceremonies!/you can write the story!
Had a close friend send me an email about the joy she found in the simplest of chores. She wrote:
In fact, I was so happy about this that I did my entire sofa and two chairs. I got a glimpse of what my whole apartment would look like clean. I looked around at all the things in here and confirmed to myself that everything I have I LOVE. I felt what it would feel like to have everything absolutely clean. It was a wonderful feeling.
I've got a fire going (foggy and damp again) to chase off the damp, the puppies are sleeping (along with my housemates), and I've got the joint to myself. TV on low in the background, coffee in the mug, listening to the occasional car go by on 9. Only thing missing are the sounds of birds chirping or the sound of a gentle rain but it is too early for both of them.
I stepped out on the deck to double check the name of the squash and all I could hear was the gentle sound of the creek on its journey to the Pacific. Wish I could capture that sound for you. So soft, so delicate sounding dispite its strength.
I find peace here at the little cabin on the creek in the redwoods. Wishing you peace and wonderful feelings.